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Bleach 300: Aizen bowls a perfect game

Bleach episode 300 review

The long-awaited return of Yoruichi Shihouin comes in this episode, minutes after Kisuke Urahara failed to defeat Aizen. Then it’s both of them going at Aizen, and neither can make much headway. Throw in Isshin Kurosaki, and you’ve got the Three Stooges getting schooled by one guy.

Meanwhile, Ichigo continues his fight with Gin, and for some reason Rangiku and Izuru want to get involved. I know there are some personal reasons there, but it seems so random that they suddenly decide they’re in this fight after lying around for the last 30 episodes.

Isshin couldn’t do it. Kisuke couldn’t do it. Yoruichi couldn’t do it. That’s three strikes, and if this was baseball, they’d be out. But this isn’t baseball, this is bowling. And three strikes in a row is a turkey. (I once very proudly bowled a turkey in my bowling class in college. Got me an A in the class.) The turkeys here are Isshin, Kisuke, and Yoruichi, who are supposed to be strong, but pale in comparison to Aizen. That means that there’s only one person left who can beat Aizen…

Hanataro! Yes, Hanataro is our last line of defense. Come on, Hanataro, go beat Aizen for us!

Best girl of the episode: Yoruichi (17) (moving into a tie for fifth with Yachiru)

Episode rating: 8/10

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Bleach 299: Home For Infinite Losers

Bleach episode 299 review

I got fooled again. Knowing full well that episode 300 is about Aizen vs. Urahara, I kept wondering and wondering as this episode went along how this was going to be tied up by the end of the episode. Basically, there’s a new enemy: Sinners. These are basically souls that have escaped from hell, otherwise known as Home For Infinite Losers. There’s a new bad guy, who is in hell alongside Szayelaporro and Arroniero. And these guys are up to no good, so the Soul Society calls a Captains’ meeting, while Rukia and Renji are sent out to face them, with Old Man Yama specifically saying that Ichigo must not know about it. And all this in 20 minutes! How is this going to get wrapped up?

Well, at the very last second, I see the reason: this entire episode is just a trailer for the fourth Bleach movie, The Hell Verse. Somehow I never figured that out until that last scene that says to catch the fourth Bleach movie in theaters. Wow. I got fooled again.

I have to say, this movie is tempting to watch now that I’ve seen the extended trailer for it. Maybe we can squeeze the Bleach movies into this blog?

Best girl of the episode: Rukia (56)

Episode rating: 7/10

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Bleach 298: Don’t go killing me off

Bleach episode 298 review

For filler episodes, this one is a doozy. The Soul Society, under the direction of Nanao Ise, decides that they need to make movies in order to help the sagging Seireitei economy. As Ernie Johnson so eloquently said, I kid you not.

So then Ichigo has to go make a movie with his pals, and that requires a whole lot of tomfoolery. Ichigo gets beat up, attacked, knocked around, and altogether just bullied, in an attempt to make an entertaining movie. I’d be wasting your time telling you the plot of this episode, because this is just made for laughs. The fourth wall is completely smashed and torn down. You either choose to laugh along or you skip to the next episode. Oh, that’s filler too? Well, in any case, this is one of those Bleach episodes that makes absolutely zero sense, there for the entire point of eating up time… and yet it works, because it is so funny. Bonus points to Retsu Unohana for stealing the show in the early scenes, but ultimately I’m going with…

Best girl of the episode: Nanao (7) (her antics at the beginning of the episode while establishing it as a complete farce were unforgettable)

Episode rating: 7/10

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Bleach 297: I Can See for Miles and Miles

Bleach episode 297 review

Before we can get to Isshin vs. Aizen or something else juicier, GIn Ichimaru reminds us that he’s still alive and he needs to die at some point. His Zanpakuto can reach for miles and miles. It can reach for miles and miles. It can reach for miles and miles and miles and miles and miles and miles and miles. You get the picture. Thirteen kilometers, which equals eight miles. So, he destroys pretty much everything in sight, but who cares, because it’s all fake anyway!

So, Gin and Ichigo are at it, and right when this battle’s about to get good, Kisuke Urahara appears out of nowhere. That will become notable once we’ve reached the bowling episode. Bowling, you say? Well, what’s a perfect score in bowling? That’s the clue to when Kisuke is going to attack. But for now, it’s filler, filler night, and no one’s gonna save you from the beast about to strike.

Spoiler: If you haven’t figured it out yet, Kisuke attacks in episode 300, and until then we’ve got filler.

Best girl of the episode: Rangiku (35) (she appears for a few seconds in this episode, which is a few seconds more than any other girl)

Episode rating: 7/10